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Memories
They can offer you the warmth of a quilted comforter fresh from the dryer
or the biting sting of an unsuspected slap across the face delivered by someone you love and respect.
Anything, of
course can light the fuse of remembrance: a sound, a smell, a vision, a dream. It is amazing to me that after such an occurrence
the raw emotion of the most joyous of times…that first kiss, your wedding day, the birth of a child…or of the
profoundly saddest of times….an abusive situation, the death of a child, someone leaving you…can be felt as though
it had happened but a moment ago. The greater the emotional content of these mindful photos from our past, the greater the
clarity. If you have ever lost someone dear to you, try to recall in your mind’s eye the features of this most significant
person. Likely you will have difficulty in recalling the detail of their aspect. Now recall your interactions and experiences
with that same person. This recollection may very well have a soft tear rolling gently down your cheek or place the widest
of smiles upon your lips. Events you thought long since buried deep in the cob-webbed catacombs of your psyche are dusted
off, polished, and presented anew. Years after you had thought you had wept all there was to weep, you find that the river
had not run dry at all. The waters had merely been retained and saved for future irrigation.
Sometimes I think too
much, analyze too much. I’m constantly reflecting on the past and on the future. It’s two steps forward and one
step back. Or sometimes one step forward and two steps back. It can cause one doubt as to whether they are advancing at all.
For
me, of late, my memories, both good and bad, have for whatever reason, come rushing to the surface. But for the first time
in perhaps my entire life, sadness and regret has not led to food. Not of the high carb kind … not even of the low carb
kind.
Perhaps I am getting better after all.
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